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I Returned the Cart

I am a Type A person. I’m a control freak but capable of getting a lot of shit done in a short period of time.  To get that stuff done, I’m constantly thinking and planning and multitasking in order to be as efficient as possible. This morning, after a stress and tearful kid drop off at school, I headed over to Whole Foods in order to buy some alfalfa and wheat seeds for two upcoming workshops that I’m prepping for. As I drove I thought of the things I needed to do to get ready for the workshops next week as well as the one I’m teaching on Friday here in Portland, and I also thought of the things I needed for my family while at the store, and how to juggle the other stuff on my very full plate.

I parked at the far end of the lot, shopped fast, and got out of there in under $75 and 15 minutes.  Not bad.  I pushed the cart back to my car at the far end of the lot, unloaded my bags, and looked around for the classic Hannaford–midlot cart drop off. There wasn’t one. I heaved out one deep and frustrated sigh and considered leaving my cart right where I was.  I took a deep breath in and decided to be a good girl and return the cart to the front entrance. After approximately six steps I looked up at the gorgeous blue sky with sprinkled fair-weather clouds throughout, I felt the perfect Maine fall temperature and realized how ridiculous I was being. These few outdoor minutes across the parking lot were mine.  I could choose to enjoy them or to not. I could choose to breathe deeply or shallowly.  I could choose to keep my face in a scowl, continue to think of all the things I needed to do, continue to look down instead of up, and I could continue to feel frustrated.

I chose to relax my face. I chose to breathe deeply. I chose to not think. I chose to enjoy my two and a half minute walk across the parking lot while I looked up at the utterly beautiful Maine sky.  When I got back in my car, I rolled down my windows, continued to breathe deeply, and kept connecting with all the little things that make me more peaceful inside of this type A body and mind.

Those few short minutes outside affect my well being. When I’m fully present in any outdoor setting, even if it truly is only a few minutes here and a few there, I am happier and healthier and less grouchy and less controlling. I’m already looking forward to a walk outside later today–after all, two and a half minutes to and from the car wouldn’t be enough for the 365 Everyday Outside Challenge–but, they were enough to make a difference in that moment.

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